There I was, Saturday evening in the restaurant, sitting opposite my wife, engaging in casual conversation. Warm bread was delivered by the waiter, which I ate with gusto, the bread not the waiter. This was quickly followed by the salad. I had forgotten to say dressing on the side when ordering, but resigned myself to the salad stew. After about ten minutes came the main course of steak, rice and vegetables. I finished the vegetables first, then some rice and proceeded to cutting my steak. The first bite was a mouthful of tender meat which I couldn’t taste because of the overpowering use of steak spice by the chef. After the second bite a warm glow spread throughout my body and reached up to my head. I put my knife and fork down and took some deep breaths. My wife asked if I was feeling okay to which I replied that I was feeling a little weird, but don’t worry it will pass. I sat there for the next ten minutes continuing the battle with my head while my wife finished her meal.
I felt like the left hemisphere of my brain was fighting with the right hemisphere, my head conflicted with trying to establish order over chaos. One part of my brain said close your eyes, give in to the feeling and just lie down, while the other half said stay alert, sit up and don’t look at the food. My conscious mind was absorbing all kinds of information. The partially eaten plate of food in front of me, which was making me nauseous every time I glanced down. My wife’s concerned look, the waiters hurrying by with their trays of food. Was that waiter giving me a strange look. Do I look weird. I seemed to be an observer looking on far removed from the reality of the restaurant setting. This dream like state continued for the ten minutes that my wife was finishing her food. It made me think about the brain versus consciousness. My brain was sending orders to my body, to stay upright, to stay alert and to not look at the food or it will make you nauseous. But the totality of this experience was a lot more than my brain telling my body how to respond. It was quite a state of being. Which I hope won’t be repeated anytime soon.
It’s Monday and I’m almost myself again thank you.